Month: May 2017

Wonder Woman Expectations

Ben DeSanti

Hello, and welcome to this edition of Film Expectations. If you happened to notice the title, yes, we are doing this edition on Wonder Woman. In case you didn’t know, Wonder Woman is the fourth installment of the DC Extended Universe, and it will in fact be debuting this Friday to the United States. Hopefully, it’s just as good as I thought the rest of the DCEU was, and not as good as most people think they’ve been. And exactly how good I think it’ll be, let’s talk about right now.

Now, I feel like because I just talked about it, that I have to talk about my projections for a Rotten Tomatoes score, as well as what I’m thinking the movie will score on my review. Considering all the past movies have scored under a 60 Percent on the ratings service, with Man Of Steel scoring a 55, Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice getting a 28, and Suicide Squad receiving the lowest score out of all the DCEU movies to date of 25, so I’m thinking that this film will be suffering the same fate. Now, obviously, I can’t blame Rotten Tomatoes, because Rotten Tomatoes is only a site that combines all the major reviews on each movie, and to blame it would be fucking unreasonable. Personally, I’m thinking the movie’s not going to be as good as the rest of the DCEU movies, but I’m feeling like it definitely won’t be the worst DC film I’ve ever seen, so I’ll be projecting it’ll be a 3.75 out of 5 stars, or 75 percent.

Now, for the financially gross. Now, BoxOfficePro released it’s projections for Wonder Woman, and it’s pretty damn low. They have the first DC female-led movie only making $83 million dollars over the course of the June 2nd weekend, and only making $225 million dollars in it’s entire domestic run. Well, that’s weird, because Batman V. Superman made about $500 million dollars in it’s domestic run, and if the first ever Wonder Woman can’t make at least 60 percent of what that movie made, it’s bullshit, my friends. I’m projecting that the movie will make at least $110 million dollars in it’s opening weekend, $350 million dollars in it’s entire domestic run, and $750 million dollars worldwide.

And that’s all for this edition of Film Expectations. Please join me Friday for my Wonder Woman theories, and then next Friday again for my Wonder Woman review. Okay, again, thanks for reading, catch you next time, and remember, have a nerdy day.

Featured News: May 2016

Ben DeSanti

Hello, and welcome to another edition of Featured News. The month is indeed May of 2016. Outside of the debut of Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2, there was only small bits of casting news, and a major update on the progression of Justice League. So with that introduction, let’s get into it.

Of course, Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2 debuted at the beginning of this month, to the utter excitement of every Marvel fan. The movie, as of May 24th, has grossed $431.5 million out side of the U.S. and $304.5 domestically for a total of $736.9 million in a matter of 20 days. The movie has absolutely crushed in major markets like China, Canada, and the U.S., and is still projected to make money than $1 billion by the end of it’s theater run, which will most likely be around the time Spider-Man: Homecoming hits theaters in early July. In addition to the tons of money this movie has been made, Marvel has already announced plans for a third Guardians Of The Galaxy film, with the only person confirmed to return is James Gunn as director and producer.

There has been some casting news from the set of Aquaman, with Otis Dhanji portraying a younger version of Jason Momoa’s Aquaman/ Arthur Curry, Ludi Lin playing Murk, the leader of the Men-Of-War, the frontline army of Atlantis, and finally, Dolph Lundgren will be playing Nereus, a leader of another undersea nation named Xebel. Lundgren will possibly play like the Namor to Mera’s Susan Storm and Arthur’s Reed Richards, in the way that Nereus will probably ended being incredibly infatuated with Mera as a subplot for Aquaman.

And finally, sad news coming from Warner Bros, as it has been announced that Autumn Snyder, daughter of Justice League director Zack Snyder and producer Deborah Snyder, has committed suicide. The college student had actually died back in March 2017, but the male Snyder decided to wait until this last week to come out with the news. In the aftermath of the news, both Zack and Deborah Snyder have decided to step down from the post-production of Justice League. Joss Whedon, director of the first two Avengers films, will be taking over for Zack during reshoots of Justice League.

And that’s all for now. Even though it’s a very small gesture, I would like to extend my condolences to the Snyder family, and I’ll be dedicating this article for Autumn Snyder. I’ll see the rest of you on Wednesday for my Wonder Woman Expectations, and again on Friday for my Wonder Woman Theories. Again, I implore you all to pray for the Snyder family, and I’ll see you next time.

Character Of The Month: June 2017: Doctor Poison

Ben DeSanti

Doctor Poison. One of the oldest Wonder Woman villains, she hid her identity to preform her nefarious deed in a man’s world. Are you interested now, especially for a character with such a ridiculous name? Well, let’s get to it.

Like I said, Doctor Poison did hide herself to do some pretty fearsome shit. In 1942, a princess named Maru donned a bulky hooded costume and mask to become the much more tough-seeming Doctor Poison, just so she could become the leader of a Nazi spy ring, so we’re already off to a great start. The Nazi ring’s ultimate goal is a simple one, and it’s just to “wreak havoc” in the US Army. Doctor Poison ends up putting a chemical called “reverso” in the water supply for the Army, and the chemical “confuses the brain centers… [making] soldiers do the exact opposite of what they are told”, which is definitely something straight out of a comic book. The chemical ends up hospitalizing tens of thousands of American soldiers, and Doctor Poison turns up afterwards, and she abducts Steve Trevor and Diana Prince, which is Wonder Woman’s alter ego, to learn spy secrets. Of course, Wonder Woman ends up foiling the rest of Doctor Poison’s plan, and all is well and good.

In the New 52 imprint of DC Comics, Doctor Poison is the daughter of two Russian of scientists, who known for their expertise in poisons. American spies approached them parents, thinking they could lead to the U.S.’s biological weapons program. They refused, and the Russian government branded them terrorists, and they were imprisoned near Siberia,where they died during interrogations, probably waterboarding, or as I like to call it, a George Bush Slip ‘N’ Slide. Doctor Poison ended up blaming the U.S. for her parents’ deaths, and she took revenge on them through chemical attacks, which were mostly stopped by Wonder Woman. And in the Rebirth imprint, Maru was yet again retconned in her origin, now living as Colonel Marina Maru, a soldier working for an organization called Poison which had been founded by her family. She ends up creating the Maru virus, which is a neurological toxin that drives men to commit murder.

And yet again, for about the sixtieth time, thank you a lot for reading, it does make me feel good writing for this blog, and for you. Please join me Monday for May’s Featured News, Wednesday for my Wonder Woman Expectations, and again on Friday for my Wonder Woman Theories. Okay, I think that covers it. Again, thanks for reading, and remember, have a nerdy day.

HDCU I; Flash I: Rogue

Ben DeSanti

Hello, and welcome to something I’ve been waiting a damn long time to put this to page in a correct fashion, because the last time sucked, the HDCU, and Flash: Rogue. Like I said before, will be treating these films as if they’re actually going to be made, to kind of add to the experience.

FLASH: ROGUE Reference Release Date: 5/ 4/ 2018

Now, this date isn’t for marking the ages of any actors, or meant to compete with any other comic films planned for this day, but just for me to schedule these movies around some actual dates for reference.

Director

  • Director: J.J. Abrams
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Nicolas Winding Refn, Alex Proyas, Bryan Singer, Christopher Nolan, Nima Nourizadeh
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Star Trek, and Star Trek Into Darkness.
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: None yet.
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: Justice League.

Cast

  • Dan Stevens as Barry Allen/ The Flash (1st appearance)
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Ryan Gosling, Alex Pettyfer, Ryan Reynolds, Ryan Kwanten, Garrett Hedlund, Andrew Garfield, Evan Peters, Adam Driver, Taron Egerton, Jesse Eisenberg, Donald Glover, Scoot McNairy, Joel McHale, Jamie Bell
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: David Haller in FX’s Legion
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: Not yet.
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: Blue Beetle, The Riddler.
  • Joel Edgerton as Leonard Snart/ Captain Cold (1st appearance)
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Jason Clarke, Jai Courtney
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: Owen Lars in Star Wars: Episode II and III.
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: No
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: Deathstroke.
  • Brie Larson as Iris West (1st appearance)
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Emily Van Camp, Emma Stone, Kristen Stewart
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: Captain Marvel in the MCU.
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: Nothing yet.
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: Nada.

  • Jason Clarke as Cpt. George “Digger” Harkness Ret./ Boomerang (1st appearance

    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Ben Mendelsohn, Joel Edgerton, Sam Worthington, David Wenham, Hugh Jackman

    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: John Conner in Terminator: Genysis.

    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: Not yet.

    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: Brainiac, Captain Atom, Wade Eiling, The Atom.

  • Jeremy Renner as Sam Scudder/ Mirror Master (1st appearance)
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Michael Fassbender, Ewan McGregor, Daniel Craig
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: James Bond for Casino Royale, Quantum Of Solace, Skyfall, Spectre.
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: Not yet.
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: Jarvis Kord, Thomas Wayne, Maxwell Lord, and King Faraday.
  • Scott Glenn as Cpt. Darryl Frye, CCPD (1st appearance)
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Michael Keaton, Ed Harris
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: Stick on Marvel’s Daredevil.
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: Not yet.
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: Perry White, King Faraday, Pa Kent, Wade Eiling, Wintergreen, Deathstroke, Commissioner Gordon.
  • David Tennant as Roscoe Dillon/ Top (1st appearance)
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Ben Mendelsohn, David Wenham, Hugh Jackman, Domnhall Gleeson
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: Tenth Doctor in Doctor Who, and as Kilgrave in Jessica Jones.
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: Not yet.
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: The Joker.
  • Gary Oldman as Dr. Martin Stein (1st appearance)
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Ben Mendelsohn, Stellan Skarsgard.
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: James Gordon in The Dark Knight trilogy, Dennett Norton in Robocop.
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: Not yet.
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: No.
  • Yvonne Strahovski as Lisa Snart/ Golden Glider (1st appearance)
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Margot Robbie, Krysten Ritter, Emma Stone
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: Sarah Walker in Chuck. 
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: Not yet.
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: No.
  • Diego Luna as Mark Mardon/ Weather Wizard (1st appearance)
    • ALTERNATE PICKS: Matt Smith, Cillian Murphy, Gael Garcia Bernal
    • REAL LIFE ROLES IN COMIC/ NERD CULTURE PRODUCTIONS: Cassian Andor in Rogue One.
    • ROLES IN MY OTHER UNIVERSES: Not yet.
    • OTHER ROLES CONSIDERED IN THIS UNIVERSE: El Diablo.

Plot Summary

The main synopsis of this fill is that it’s been a year since the particle accelerator explosion , and even though the Flash has his team in Dr. Stein, Iris, and Darryl, he has yet to face a truly experienced enemy. Enter the Rogues, a.k.a Task Force V, Amanda Waller’s first attempt to make a team of criminals with built-in deniability as the director of A.R.G.U.S. They were common criminals that were already compiled by themselves, but then hired by A.R.G.U.S. as private contractors. That all fell through while the Rogues were caught in the particle accelerator explosions. They were presumed dead, stripped of rank, and return to a life of robbing banks, the only line of work that makes sense to them. The Flash comes upon them as they are in the midst of holding up Central City Third Bank. Barry goes in on them, figuring they had their weapons. Well, Team Flash was totally wrong, as Snart and his gang of merry men had actually gained the abilities of their weapons. In utter shock, and seriously injured from the ensuing battle, The Flash retreats to make a game plan. About halfway through the film, after some character development for the cast, The Flash gets back to the playing field, and finds the Rogues’ hideout outside of the city. They get into a fight, and while Top is spinning, Barry accidentally hits him through a train. The Rogues, minus Top, rush to the civilians’ aide, much to the surprise of The Flash. While the various first responders tend to the wounded at the scene, the Rogues leave, and the police take in an incapacitated Top, Barry talks to Darryl about how the Rogues aren’t so bad, and that they need to take them out with the least amount of pain, because underneath, they’re good people. The rest of the second act of the film is both teams preparing for a final showdown between the two sides. But it takes a strange turn, with the Flash picking off the members one by one (except Sam and Lisa, who are together when Flash confronts them all, in the order of Weather Wizard, then Harkness, then Sam and Lisa together. The final battle between Flash and Leonard takes them to different locations; Keystone City, Midway City, and finally back to in front of Central City Third Bank, where they first met. Leonard rants about how the Flash, despite his speed, won’t save everyone, and he never will. He says the Rogues were just trying to get by in this, after they lost everything, and it’s all the Flash and his friends that try to intervene in everything destroyed his life, and made him into a freak. Snart goes in for the kill, and Barry is forced to deliver an instant knockout blow to Snart, and everything is over. By the end of the film, Barry is left wondering, “Did I actually win? Did anyone?”

Mid-Credits Scene

The mid-credits scene is simply General Zod (Ken Wantanabe, 1st appearance) staring out of the window of a Kryptonian spaceship, speaking to two other beings in deep sleep and saying “Rise, my children, we have a mission. To find Kal-El.”

Post Credits Scene

Here, we find Roscoe Dillon/ Top (David Tennant), sitting at a table in a prison block common area, wearing an orange jumpsuit. A mysterious man comes and sits down at the table, back facing the camera. He says, in a soothingly sinister voice, “Hello, Roscoe. I have an offer for you.”, before reaching his hand across the table for Roscoe to shake. The camera slowly swings behind Top’s back, revealing Vandal Savage (Christoph Waltz, 1st appearance). Top takes his hand, and with an even more sinister seeming smile, Savage stands and says, “Wonderful. We have work to do.”, before the film cuts to black.

Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed. The next installment of this series will be HDCU II; Superman I: Last Son, which will be debuting on September 15th. And until next time, thanks again for reading, and remember, have a nerdy day.

Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2 Review

Ben DeSanti

(WARNING: Spoilers for Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2!)

Hello, and welcome once again to another one of my reviews. This week, we’ve got Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2. Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2 is, of course, the epic follow up to 2014’s immensely popular Guardians Of The Galaxy. James Gunn returns to the helm of the sequel, and is joined by returning cast members Chris Pratt, Zoe Saldana, Dave Bautista, Vin Diesel, Bradley Cooper, Michael Rooker, Karen Gillan, and Sean Gunn, as well as new cast members Kurt Russell as Ego, Elizabeth Debicki as Ayesha, Chris Sullivan as Taserface, Pom Klementieff as Mantis, and Sylvester Stallone as Stakar Ogord. With that listed, let’s get into the review.

Now, the story that James Gunn weaved was truly incredible. Personally, I enjoyed the Celestial storyline of the movie, it was just riveting. The short explanation is that Ego reveals he is a Celestial, an eons-old being with incredible powers that rivals that of Thanos and Dormammu, and that his human form is actual just a guise, and he’s truly in the form of the planet that his human form and Mantis lives on, and that he developed a human form to escape his loneliness and meet other lifeforms. I thought that wasn’t true at all, but it played out well. We end up learning that Ego actually impregnates tons of women from different alien races, took the children, and used them to try and give himself more power, and when all of them don’t work, he kills them. We actually learns that Ego hired Yondu to take Peter Quill, who is revealed as Ego’s son, to Ego so he could use him to gain power as well, but Yondu ended up keeping Quill when he found out Ego’s plan. We also found out that that Ego gave Quill’s mom, Meredith, a brain tumor on purpose so that Quill could be manipulated more easily by Ego. Ego ends up forcing an adult Quill into developing Celestial powers, which ends up with Quill fighting and beating Ego, and the rest of the Guardians kill Ego’s planet form by destroying his brain in the planet core. Yondu is killed in this encounter, and Sylvester Stallone shows up as a Ravager who goes to Yondu’s funeral, and it’s truly awesome. The plot is explained horribly here, so just go watch the movies.

I honestly was thinking going into Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2 that it had a massive potential to just end up as some hackneyed, bullshit ripoff of the first movie, as many did. It wasn’t exactly an unfounded idea. I mean, this had ended up being the case with a couple Marvel sequels, specifically Thor: The Dark World, Iron Man 2, and Avengers: Age Of Ultron. But I should have absolutely never doubted James Gunn and company, because it was an incredibly film sequel. Maybe not The Dark Knight or Kill Bill: Volume 2, but it was truly a fantastic movie. I give Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2 4.4 out of 5 stars.

As always, thanks for reading, guys, you are the best. Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2 is in theaters now. Please join me once again next week for my version of a DC Cinematic Universe, starting with an imagining of a “The Flash” movie, which will of course start and tie-in to the rest the universe. Alright, thanks again for reading, and always, remember to have a nerdy day.

Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2 Theories

Ben DeSanti

Hey, hello there, didn’t see you behind all these theories. Down here at The Blog Of Hell’s Kitchen, we’ve got old theories, we got new theories, and now, we’ve got theories for movies that haven’t even come out yet. This fine Friday we’ve got some solid theories for the newest installment of the Guardians Of The Galaxy, Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2. So, because I don’t have more time to make fun of car salesmen, let’s get into it.

My first theory of the day is; Kurt Russell’s Ego will become a kind of team leader for the Guardians Of The Galaxy, with Chris Pratt’s Star-Lord being a field leader for the team. The relationship I’m thinking they would have is somewhat like the relationship between Viola Davis’ Amanda Waller and Joel Kinnaman’s Rick Flag Jr. from Suicide Squad. Or, even when Kurt Russell’s Mister Nobody guided Vin Diesel’s Dom Toretto and the rest of the Fast and Furious team, or whatever they’re called, I haven’t watched all of the movies, from the comfort of his hopefully Snake Pilssken-themed office in Furious 7. If this were to happen, it would certainly be a fitting, and highly entertaining, end to the second installment of the franchise before the team heads to Avengers: Infinity War. And if Kurt Russell does end up on the side of the Guardians, it would be fantastic to see him with them, as a fully functional team in Infinity War. Maybe, the entire start to their part of the story in Infinity War could start with the Guardians out on a mission, and then Ego in his human form running point back on his own planet form, which sounds a little weird, but those Guardians are pretty weird.

Or, if you think that first theory was much too hopeful, I have just the theory for you. I think the Guardians could end up beating Ayesha and the Ravagers with Ego and Mantis by their side in the first two acts, and then somewhere in the third act, we could find out that Ego has been using an unsuspecting spy on the Guardians, and he’s the actual villain. It could work out perfectly if you think about it. Mantis would be the most perfect pawn, considering in the trailers, Mantis seems completely oblivious to anything that’s going on, especially when she got hit by a meteorite, and probably didn’t even realize it until she got hit with it, or maybe even a little after. It would certainly be an interesting twist on the story.

And finally, we have a theory on who I think Sylvester Stallone and Michael Rosenbaum will be playing. We’ve already been told that Stallone’s character will indeed be a member of the Nova Corps, and that he will be working closely with Rosenbaum’s character, who is also supposed to be a Nova Corpsmen. During my research, I found the two Corpsmen the actors are most likely to be are Richard Rider and Jesse Alexander, respectively. Stallone, being a leader-type with hothead tendencies, would be a fantastic pick for an older Richard Rider, and Rosenbaum as a confident young-ish Corpsmen who eventually becomes an alcoholic would be just as amazing to see. And, with Stallone and Rosenbaum acting as Corpsmen, maybe they can be in a Nova movie, or Marvel could cast some to play Sam Alexander, who ends up becoming a Nova as well, and Marvel could use Stallone and Rosenbaum as major supporting characters.

And that has been my time. Please join me next Friday for my review of Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2. Anyways, thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed, and remember, have a nerdy day.

Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 Expectations

Ben DeSanti

Are you hooked on a feeling? Well, damn, I am, too. Are you a cherry bomb? Hell, yeah, you are, you dirty bird. Do I sound like I just woke up out of a coma after car crash in 1978 because I forgot to wear my new-fangled seatbelts? Yes, I most definitely do. Should I just get on with this article about what I think Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 will do critically and financially? Yes, I most definitely should, and will right now. So, let’s get into it.

Now, I think Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 will do great with fans, obviously. The first installment of the space opera comedy was a smash with fans far and wide. It ultimately ended up with about 773.3 million dollars worldwide, which was far beyond what many people who were critical of the concept of a genetically-enhanced raccoon mercenary riding a tree man like a parrot on a pirate’s shoulder. And then it gets even more complicated when they’re joined by two green people, and Kurt Russell’s criminal son. And even then, those five assholes go fight a couple ‘roided up versions of the Blue Man Group. I’m projecting, due to it’s predecessor’s unconventional success, and the excitement from other people who didn’t get to watch it in theaters, but have since on DVD, this film will make at least 1 billion dollars worldwide by the end of it’s theatrical run.

Now, critically speaking, I think this movie’ll be great in the eyes of critics. The previous film was rated an overall 91 percent Fresh score on Rotten Tomatoes, and that’s probably going to be hard to beat, especially considering that the original will have the shock-and-awe factor that the weirdness it contained. People are used to watching that weird shit now, no one’s going to be as fascinated as they were the first time watching Earth, Wind, And Fire jump around like Mario over a Smurf version of Tom Hardy’s Bane. And of course, I think this film will hit the sophomore slump, but only a little. So, I think that, based on my research, Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 a 81% rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

And that has been my time, thank you so much for reading. Remember to join me on Wednesday for my Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2 Expectations, and join me again on Friday for my review of the James Gunn space adventure. Until then, have a great day, see you later, and remember, have a nerdy day.